Sports isn#039;t worth a death

Published 12:00 am Monday, August 29, 2005


Have you ever called in sick the next day when you had a little too much to drink at the Super Bowl party?

Sure, we all have.

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When you get the paper every morning, do you automatically take out the sports section and then throw the rest away?

Sure, we all have.

Have you ever mapped out your daily activities so that you don't miss the big game?

Sure, we all have.

Have you ever killed your wife because she nagged you to cuddle with her instead of watch sports?

Not all of us have, but one Florida man did.

Now he has been sentenced to die.

Christopher Offord, 30, was sentenced on Wednesday to death by a circuit judge after Offord stuck his wife in the head with a claw hammer at least 70 times after having a special moment together in 2004. After that moment, Dana Noser pleaded for her husband to cuddle with her instead of watch sports.

So in response to Noser's pleading, Offord grabbed a hammer and beat her to death.

Offord later confessed how he killed his wife.

Where did that confession take place?

Where else but a sports bar.

Most sports junkies would admit going to extremes to get their daily sports fix. We are just like crack addicts. If we don't get that fix, we go through withdrawls like wanting to watch rhythmic gymnastics or synchronized swimming.

But I don't believe killing our spouse has ever crossed our minds just so we can catch a game on TV.

Sure you would like to take the duct tape out and tape your spouse's mouth shut because he or she is talking to you while you are tuned into the game, but you don't.

You know if you actually tried that it would only put you in the dog house later or out of the house if you don't have a dog.

We all have been there when the spouse wants us to go shopping during the fourth quarter with one minute left to play and our team is driving for that game-winner.

We have all been there when that special get-together coincides with the big game.

That's what VCRs or DVD recorders are for.

Remember, a spouse's love is more important than sports.

And for us sports junkies, our second love is our VCR or DVD recorder.

Kevin Taylor is sports editor of The Greenville Advocate. E-mail him at or call (334) 383-9203 ext. 122.