Those fun-loving anchormen

Published 12:00 am Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Well he did it.

Tom Brokaw, dubbed the most trusted man in America, has completed his final election as anchor of NBC's Nightly News.

I am a Brokaw fan.

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I've always said that if the world was about to end, I'd want him to be the one to tell me.

Not Dan Rather and not Peter Jennings.

It would have to be Brokaw.

As for his successor, that is never an easy thing to determine.

I'm sure that Brian Williams will do a fine job of delivering the news, but he'll never have the Brokawesque way of doing so.

As for Rather, I can't watch him. I feel queasy watching him.

Many lost respect for him earlier this year with his handling of the Bush military records scandal.

Well, I lost respect for him several years ago when he began to wear sweaters and end his newscasts with hopeful words because an advisory group told him it was good.

I think they were pulling his leg.

Plus, he can come up with some of the oddest things at the oddest times.

I read a column about him earlier this week in the days after the election and wanted to share some of the "Ratherisms" of the previous night.

They were:

n &uot;Don’t taunt the alligator until after you have crossed the creek.&uot;

n &uot;Play a verse of Johnny Be Goode in Illinois for John Kerry.&uot;

n &uot;George Bush is sweeping through the South like a big wheel through a cotton field.&uot;

n &uot;Lookey here-whoo-boy at Florida.&uot;

n &uot;This presidential race is hotter than the Devil’s anvil.&uot;

n &uot;Politics has gotten so expensive it takes a lot of money just to get beat.&uot;

n &uot;George Bush’s lead is as thin as November ice.&uot;

n &uot;Only votes talk, everything else walks.&uot;

n &uot;Never gamble with strangers and never vote against a Republican in Kansas.&uot;

n &uot;Colorado – when John Kerry wrote Santa Claus he was saying, ‘Give me this state if you can, please.’ &uot;

n &uot;Arkansas will be whoopee news down in Texas.&uot;

I'm all for homespun and I can even enjoy a little folksy, but these were too much to share.

As for Jennings, well when he criticized Toby Keith for his Red, White and Blue for its language, I became disenchanted with him as well.

I'm never an advocate for change and as I see it, Brokaw should remain in his lofty perch above Times Square and do what he does best, deliver the news.

Jay Thomas is the managing editor of The Greenville Advocate and can be reached at 382-3111, ext. 136 or via email at jay.thomas@greenvilleadvocate.com.