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Why are birthdays even necessary

Watching all of the trick or treaters over the weekend made me realize how much I hate getting older. I can still remember how much fun it was to challenge myself to top the previous years candy pull. My mission was always to get enough candy to keep myself from getting any sleep for about a month. They are days I miss very much. Looking back on those days makes me wish I could freeze time and stay young forever. Unfortunately, none of us really get a choice in that regardŠor do we?

Who says that we have to keep getting older? If we stop acting older do the age police come after you? To tell you the truth, I see no consequences at all to ending the aging process right now.

So here it goes. From this point on I will have no more birthdays. Any of you who want to stay young forever are more than welcome to join me. I have chosen 27 as the age to stick with from here on out. It is a nice number and the last one I celebrated so it will be easy to remember.

Don't get me wrong, I love the whole process of the birthday celebration. Nothing makes me happier than cake and presents. But when the candles are out and the gifts are unwrapped the harsh reality is still there. You are one year older.

I have noticed these years flying by at the speed of light since I left high school. To tell you the truth it seems like every time I turn around another year has passed. That will no longer be a problem. I am going to turn the next 38 years into one long one.

I have tried to weigh the advantages and disadvantages of this and have come to the conclusion it is a good idea. The only disadvantage I could find were scheduling conflicts due to my one long year.

The advantages were many. I will never have to complain about the younger generation because I will always be one of them.

I will never have to say the most feared words of any human being "I'm too old for that."

Most importantly, I never have to stop acting young. I know there is no rule that says just because a person starts to get older they have to stop having fun. I just want to be sure!

So don't expect to see me complaining about the aches and pains of getting older. I am still young and plan to stay that way for as long as possible. I will acknowledge my age only when it is time to retire. Until that time I will enjoy life and continue to act as loopy as I want.

So this is it. Until my big birthday blow out in 2042 I will stay safely planted at the young age of 27. I know I probably need to grow up and accept the fact that we all have to get older. Some day I'm sure I will. Until that time I am going to stay right where I am!

Rick Couch may be reached at

383-9302, ext. 132 or

via email at rick. couch@greenvilleadvocate.com.